Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.
buddha
What is anger?
Anger is the emotional response that we have to an external or internal event perceived as a threat, a violation or an injustice. Anger is a perfectly normal emotion. All human beings experience anger on a different level. The experience of anger is learned and varies from person to person. For example, someone may cry when they feel angry while someone else may yell, while still someone else may become withdrawn, to name just a few of the ways in which anger manifests.
What are the different type of anger?
There is not just one type of anger that we experience, there are different types of anger that we can experience and display. Although different texts and articles suggest different forms of anger that individuals can express, here are four basic ways in which people display anger:
Aggressive: Anger is externalized, “turned loose”
Passive/Aggressive: Outwardly agreeable, but showing the anger through indirect actions or sabotage
Passive: Anger is internalized or “locked up”
Assertive: Anger is appropriately managed and communicated if necessary.
How to manage anger?
Anger management refers to a process. It can help people identify stressors. People learn steps to help them stay calm in anger management. They may then handle tense situations in a constructive, positive way.
The purpose of anger management is to help a person decrease anger. It reduces the emotional and physical arousal that anger can cause. It is generally impossible to avoid all people and settings that incite anger. But a person may learn to control reactions and respond in a socially appropriate manner. The support of a mental health professional may be helpful in this process. (Good Therapy)
Different anger management techniques
THINK BEFORE YOU ACT
Anger is not an emotion that is typically accompanied by reason. Anger is impulsive and angry young people are often impulsive as well. They aren’t considering the consequences of their actions when they do something but the reality of their situation is that there are consequences for every action, both good and bad. Before you decide on a solution to your problem, you need to think about the consequences of each of your chosen solutions and think about what will happen if you follow through with it. How will the solution end? Will everyone in the scenario be happy with the resolution? Is it in their best interest to choose that solution or will it only get them in trouble?
Having consequences for certain actions can be great incentive to keep a yourself from acting out and, paired with the realization that each action has consequences, will make it easier for you to realize the gravity of the situation and to find the motivation to learn valuable anger coping skills. When you have had experience thinking before acting, you will gain more positive experience with making the right choices and managing your anger. (Betterhelp)
RELAXATION
There are many different relaxation exercises you can utilize to reduce anger. The key is to find the one that works best for you. Breathing exercises and progressive muscle relaxation are two common strategies for reducing tension. The best part is, both exercises can be performed quickly and discreetly. So whether you’re frustrated at school or you’re angry with your friend, you can let go of stress quickly and immediately.
It’s important to note, however, that relaxation exercises take practice. At first, you might not feel as though they’re effective, or you might question whether they’re going to work for you. But with practice, they can become your go-to strategies for anger management. (Very well mind)
CALM DOWN KIT
If you tend to come home from school stressed and take out your anger on your siblings, or you know that exams cause you a lot of frustration, create a calm down kit that you can use to relax.
A calm down kit is a kit full of visuals and tools to help you cope with your emotions in a positive and safe manner. They are also known as sensory integration boxes or tool-kits. Every calm down kit can look a little different depending on your needs. It is important to tailor it to your desires and tastes, taking into account your ages, likes, and sensory needs.
Here’s the deal: a calm down kit is simply a collection of items like toys or food that will calm your child’s sensory system in a meltdown.
Click here to know how to create a calm down kit.